Sarah (USA)
Back in those days, Saul’s family and David’s family had been fighting for a long time. To put it simply, David’s side was getting stronger and stronger, while Saul’s family was losing confidence and falling apart.
David was living in Hebron, slowly getting his household established, and he had sons being born to him.
Over on Saul’s side, Saul was already dead, but he still had a son named Ish-bosheth who had become king. But truth be told, the man who really had the power and influence was a guy named Abner.
Abner had been one of Saul’s top commanders. He had soldiers, and people listened to him.
One day, Ish-bosheth suddenly confronted Abner and said:
“What’s going on with you? Why are you sleeping with my father’s concubine, Rizpah?”
Abner heard that and immediately blew his top.
He said:
“What are you talking about? I’ve been working my tail off for your father’s family all this time. I’ve protected your whole family, and I never handed you over to David. And now you’re turning against me over one woman?”
The angrier Abner got, the more he laid it out:
“Let me tell you something. If I don’t do what God has promised David, then may God punish me severely! The kingdom of Saul’s family is going to be transferred to David. David is going to rule over Israel and Judah, from Dan all the way to Beersheba!”
Ish-bosheth heard that and basically went quiet.
He was probably thinking:
“Okay… I’d better not mess with this guy.”
So Abner sent messengers to David and said:
“Who is this kingdom really supposed to belong to? If you make a covenant with me, I’ll help bring all Israel over to your side.”
David said:
“Fine, I’ll make a covenant with you. But there’s one condition—when you come to see me, you have to bring Michal back. She’s my wife.”
So David also sent messengers to Ish-bosheth and said:
“Give my wife Michal back to me. I paid for her with one hundred Philistine foreskins.”
Ish-bosheth had no choice. He took Michal away from her current husband, Paltiel.
Paltiel saw his wife being taken away and was heartbroken.
He followed her crying all the way to Bahurim.
Abner finally looked back and said:
“Alright, alright. Go home. You’ve followed her far enough.”
So Paltiel had no choice but to turn around and go home.
After that, Abner started talking to the elders of Israel.
He said:
“You guys wanted David to be king before, didn’t you? Well, now’s the time to make it happen. God already said that He would use David to rescue His people Israel from the Philistines and all their other enemies.”
He also spoke to the people of Benjamin.
Finally, Abner came to Hebron with twenty men to meet David.
David treated them pretty well. He set a big meal in front of them and gave them a proper welcome.
After they had eaten, Abner said to David:
“I’m going back now. I’ll gather all Israel together, and then they’ll come to you, my lord and king, to make a covenant with you. After that, the whole country will belong to you.”
David was pleased, so he sent Abner away in peace.
But then—here came Joab.
Joab was one of David’s top commanders. He was tough, stubborn, and not exactly the kind of guy you wanted to mess with.
Someone told Joab:
“Abner just came to see the king, and the king actually sent him away safely.”
Joab was not happy about that at all.
He went straight to David and said:
“King, what are you thinking? Abner came to see you, and you just let him walk away? Don’t you know he was probably trying to trick you and figure out everything you do? He wanted to know where you go, what you do, and what’s going on with your people!”
But before David could really explain anything, Joab had already decided what he was going to do.
He secretly sent men to chase after Abner.
They caught up with him at the well of Sirah and brought him back.
At that time, David had no idea this was happening.
Joab took Abner aside at the city gate and spoke with him privately.
Then, while Abner wasn’t expecting it, Joab suddenly attacked him and stabbed him in the stomach.
Abner died right there.
When David heard what had happened, he was furious.
He said:
“This has nothing to do with me or my kingdom! I did not do this. May this guilt fall on Joab and his whole family!”
Then David ordered everyone to tear their clothes and put on sackcloth and mourn for Abner.
And David himself walked behind Abner’s coffin.
When they reached Hebron, they buried Abner.
David stood beside the grave and cried out loud.
When the people saw their king crying like that, they cried too.
David also composed a lament for Abner. The basic meaning was:
“Abner, how did you end up dying like this?
You weren’t tied up.
Your feet weren’t chained.
Why did you have to die like someone killed by wicked men?”
When the people heard it, they cried again.
Later, the people came to David and said:
“King, you should eat something.”
David said:
“I’m not eating anything before the sun goes down. If I eat before then, may God punish me severely!”
When the people saw that, they understood:
“So Abner’s death really wasn’t David’s doing.”
And the people were very pleased with David.
Then David said to his officials:
“Think about what happened today. A great commander of Israel has died! I may have been anointed king by God, but my position is still not completely secure. The sons of Zeruiah—Joab and his brother Abishai—are stronger and more ruthless than I am right now.”
Finally, David left the matter in God’s hands and said:
“May the Lord repay the wicked according to their wickedness.”
What This Chapter Is Really About
This chapter is basically a big power transition.
Saul’s family was getting weaker, while David’s family was getting stronger. Abner had originally stood with Saul’s family, but once he realized the situation was changing, he decided to help David unite Israel.
But just when everything was about to come together, Joab killed Abner because of his personal grudge against him.
David did not kill Abner, but he had to make it publicly clear:
“I didn’t do this, and I don’t support this kind of killing behind someone’s back.”
That is why David mourned publicly and personally followed Abner’s coffin. He wanted the whole nation to know:
David wanted the kingdom God had promised him—not a kingdom grabbed through schemes, revenge, or personal grudges.